I want you to hear this short call that I got on my mobile yesterday. It was a “local painting company” offering free estimates. I said “oh, you want to talk to the homeowner. He’s right here – hang on” and then I conferenced in Whitey Whitebeard. Whitey is my favorite bot for construction and solar. Actually, he might be my favorite bot overall.

The guy sounds nice enough at first, but at the very end you’ll hear how arrogant and entitled these people are, and just how untouchable they feel. He says he is “a local painter handyman in my area” and sounds friendly. But he’s actually calling from a fake caller-id that has been localized to my city. He never really says my name and thank goodness he doesn’t seem to know my address (this time, although sometimes they do). His job is to find out if there are any construction projects I want so he can sell my information to a construction company. Need windows? Sell me to a window installer. Need solar? Sell me to a solar contractor. I don’t know how much the lead is worth. I’d love to hear from someone who does.

So that’s the telemarketer business here. Load up an autodialer with every telephone number they can find. Their autodialer calls all of them and sorts through the disconnected, busy, ring-no-answer, and voicemail to find the real live people. It’s a small percentage of the list, but hey, they can just double it tomorrow! Oh, and when you call the 213 areacode, put a local caller-id on it so the victim is more likely to answer.

And the worst thing is these guys are un-findable, un-accountable, and un-touchable. They can say anything they want to you. You’ll never find them or their employers. Listen to this call and hear how he reacts when he thinks Whitey is messing with him. Poor Whitey. But this could be your parent or child. And he doesn’t care.

So let’s get these jerks! Please subscribe to the Jolly Roger Telephone Service so you can send your telemarketers to a robot who will take over the conversation and prevent them from calling someone else. It’s entertaining, exhilarating, and empowering. It will completely change your attitude towards telemarketing.

Here’s the call. Please enjoy and thanks for listening!