Big news!

I’ve just finished development of my “Landlubber” service, which will protect your landlines out there! It uses a common feature called “simultaneous ring” that most modern landline providers offer. They all call it something different, but this is how it works:

  1. If you haven’t already done so, subscribe to the Jolly Roger Telephone Service. If you are not familiar with it, I’ll explain at the end of this announcement
  2. Configure your landline’s “simultaneous ring” feature to call the Jolly Roger Landlubber number at 206-259-4949
  3. When you get a call to your landline, your carrier will also ring Jolly Roger, and I will look up the “reputation score” of that caller-id (I’ll explain this below)
  4. If that caller-id is a likely telemarketer, A Jolly Roger bot will answer the call. This will stop the ringing on your landline and you can continue enjoying your meal.
  5. The Jolly Roger bot will chat with the telemarketer for a while. When the call is over, It will email you the recording. It’s very entertaining.
  6. If that caller-id is unknown or not a likely telemarketer, The Jolly Roger bot will ignore the call and you can answer it or let it go to your machine/voicemail.

WHAT WE DO: For those of you new to this service, The Jolly Roger Telephone Company provides robots that talk to telemarketers. We all know that yelling at them or hanging up on them doesn’t work. So I have robots that will keep them engaged. With this Landlubber service, it requires NO ADDITIONAL EFFORT on your part to protect a landline. The bots handle everything.

HOW WE SCORE THE CALLER: I use a service called TrueCNAM that provides a real-time reputation score of the caller-id. It’s a wonderful and complex algorithm that tells me if the caller is a likely telemarketer.

WHY JOLLY ROGER IS BETTER: Here is why Jolly Roger bots are better than any other telemarketer blocking service:

  • The “autodialers” that telemarketers use get stuck when they hit a Jolly Roger bot. The machines think it’s a real person and send the call to a HUMAN agent.
  • Telemarketers waste time with Jolly Roger bot for several minutes (they rarely figure out it’s a bot) so they are unable to call anyone else. Even if they do figure it out, they’re at the mercy of their autodialing machines and they’ll just get the bot again next time. It’s in THEIR BEST INTEREST to stop calling you! You don’t need to care anymore.
  • You get a recording of the call, which is extremely entertaining.
  • If the caller was NOT a telemarketer, you still get the message. They just chat with your bot for a few minutes.

You can hear plenty of examples of these bots in action on my YouTube channel. Or just search for “Jolly Roger Telephone Company” and you’ll find lots of audio.

To those of you already familiar with this service, I really appreciate your kind words and support. I’m just a telephone guy trying to protect your phones. I don’t have a marketing department so I can really use your help to spread the word. Please contact me at roger at or via Facebook if you have any questions or comments about the service! I’m so excited to announce this Landlubber service!

If anyone out there in the UK wants to test this with a local UK number, please let me know!

Thank you everyone!